"Halt, mortal! Solve my riddle or get eaten!" A huge winged lion with the head of a man blocked the way.
"Oh, so you must be the Sphinx. I always thought they were
only female?" As always, Lara Croft hadn't done her homework.
Sphinges (yup, that's the plural, I always do my homework, even for a lame porn story) come in both sexes. The one best known from Greek mythology is indeed female.
"Stupid bitch! You know nothing! You never solve my riddle.
What goes on four legs in the morning, two in the noon and
three in the evening, and the more legs, the slower it is?"
Of course, any fuckwit today knows the answer is "Man" (it's
some metaphoric shit), so it's not the phat riddle.
"42! It's the answer to life, the universe and everything!"
"Faaaaalse!" triumphed the Sphinx. "Now get eaten!"
"Riiiiight! Not reading the Hitchhiker, cheat? Then eat hot lead instead, pussy!"
Protip: Watch the tail of the Sphinx. It is long, prehensile
and good for tying up and disarming big-mouthed graverobbers
who don't watch their pretty ass.
"Oh fuck! Now I get eaten!" whined Lara.
"No, no, first eaten, then fucked."
"What? Ah! No! Stop it!" exclaimed Lara, somewhat confused of the suggested order.
The big claws ripped off Laras clothed expertingly without even scratching her, and then the pussycat buried her head
in Laras pussy, licking her with a raspy tongue. She pedaled and screamed, but the tail had tied her up completely.
"Aaaah! Noooo! Yessss!" Against her will, Lara was brought to orgasm. With one thrust, the sphinx changed positions and buried his giant penis in her. (15 cm. Surely. That is giant. For a feline.) Seconds later, he filled Lara up with a big load of Sphinx cum, roared and broke together over her, immediately beginning to snore. (Males. Always too fast.)
"Just wait until I reach my...OWWWW!"
Lara learnt the hard way that a Sphinx penis is decorated with lots of backward pointing sharp barbs, like any member of a member of the cat family. She was effectively tied to her lover until his erection would swell off. And since it was a very young Sphinx, at most a few thousand years, that would take some time. He probably just dreamt of a date with
Pantha and still was as hard as a pyramid. In the meantime, she was helpless.
Which was unfortunate as Indiana Jones stepped in. "Oh. Hi Lara. I see you straightly ran into the trap. I wonder how you always manage to turn up fucked. I assume you just learn that a Sphinx penis is decorated with lots of backward pointing sharp barbs, like any member of a member of the cat family?"
"STFU, wiseguy, and shoot this motherfucker!"
"Nah, the motherfucker belongs to a completely different Sphinx story. Greek, not Egypt. And now lie still why I secure the treasure of Pharao Titen-Ases."
"Scoundrel! Thief! That was mine! MINE!"
"You mean this thing here?"
"Ah! Look like it glows with powerful magic! MINE! MINE!"
"Well, I don't know..." Indiana Jones said alongside. "It's worlds first battery-driven shaving apparatus. See?" He shaved off a few stubbles from his pithy chin. "Amazing that it still works after some thousand years. If you really have to shave your legs, or perhaps the barbed penis of your lover...he's still erect, isn't he? Lions mate for hours...you can get one for five dollars cheap at Walmart. An electric razor, not a lion, of course. And probably not with thousand years of warranty. Anyway. This one here goes to science. Bye-bye!"
"Oh, you are still here? Let's continue where we left off."
The sphinx pulled back a bit for another thrust.
"Owww! No! Keep it in! Keep it in!" Lara knotted her legs around the loins of the Sphinx to avoid being hedgehog-buggered. "My, are you insatiable. Well, I knew that no female can resist my giant penis which is decorated with lots of backward pointing sharp barbs, like any member of a member of the cat family! Ooooh, in a few seconds I will cum again. ROOOOOAAAAAAR! PRRRR."
And then he snored again.
Finally, he was limp enough so that Lara could pull out his Dinsdale from her vagina, and grabbed for her gun. CLICK! CLICK! CLICK! "Indiana, you bastard! This was your doing!" "PRRRR? What? Why? Oh, you must want another round."
Again, the raspy tongue brought Lara to heaven, and then the Sphinx impaled her anew. "Oh my, you begin to make me feel old. You will be a great mother of my kittens...ROAR! PRR."
"Mother? Nooooooo! And I hate penises which are decorated with lots of backward pointing sharp barbs, like any member of a member of the cat family!!!"
Well, she would be hating it even more a centaur horse penis flare locked inside her throat drowning her in cum, but I currently have no idea for writing that and so it's
The End