"And heeeere is another issue of..."
[Cheering studio crowd]
"VICTIM!"
[Zoom on the anchorman]
"I'm as always your moderator B. Little and you are watching
another episode of shocking human interest stories. Our
todays guest is Mr. Inju, the innocent victim of a severe
sexual harrasment case. To protect his identity, he will talk
from behind this smokescreen."
[Camera 1 on Mr. Inju. Through the screen, you can see a
mass of writhing tentacles.]
"Please, Mr. Inju, tell your story now."
"Well, uhm. I'm a member of a minority the public usually calls
tentaclemonster. We prefer the more p.c. term Inju."
"Which means more or less the same in Japanese, right?"
[The hard-hitting yet sensible moderator uses every
opportunity to interrupt. Mr. Inju is slightly annoyed.]
"P.c. isn't about meanings, p.c. is about words. May I
continue?" "Oh, sure." "In thousands of run-of-the-mill
hentai flicks, our kind is portraited as ruthless rapers of hapless
women. We admit that we have some black sheep in our rows,
but then, who hasn't?"
"So I guess your latest bruises..." [Camera 2 shows the line
of oozy green blood Mr. Inju left when entering the studio]
"...are from a mob of revengeful fathers and husbands?"
"If it were so! No, selfsame hentai flicks invariably continue
that selfsame girls enjoy their ordeal in a series of endless
super orgasms! And while I also admit that the average Inju
would in principle a much better sex partner than the average
Joe Blow, only a minor percentage of our population is, ah
what's the word, humanophil-oriented."
"Oh, so then your wounds come from exasperation due to a
female groupie crowd and you are only human after all..."
[The moderator grins and turns to the studio crowd showing
off over his great pun. He should have watched his steps
instead and trips over a cable. In a chain reaction, a camera
topples over, taking the smoke screen with it. At the sight of
Mr. Injus lovemaking appendices, the whole female part of the
studio crowd storms over to Mr. Inju, rip of their clothes and
begins to rape him. A fight over his available tentacles ensues.]
"No, you still got it wrong!" [Mr. Inju raises his voice to
over-cry the MMMH OOOH AAAAH squeals that
immediately have begun]. "I'm an Inju! I could please hundreds
of women if I'm in good condition. But I'm a married monster!
Try telling that I'm innocent to Mrs. Injuette!!"
[A very pissed female version of Mr. Inju, but easily to
distiguish from him due to a dozen hungry cunts, storms the
studio, crying "Gotcha fornicating around again? Wait until
I get my tentacles on you!" She grabs a few cameras and
mauls Mr. Inju severely. The groupies flee. The moderator too,
crying in his mike "That was todays airing of..."
"VICTIM!" "MMMH OOOH AAAAH!" "...feel free to watch
next week too, when our theme...Please, not the halogen lamp!"
CRASH! "oh, that must have hurt...is
My husband is an unfaithful casanova!
This is B. Little, over and OUCH!"
THE END