Make war not Love

Manza wiped the blood from her labrys. Astounding - her last companion really needed a week for trying to rape her. "Unusual disciplinated for a man" she thought and walked on. Lo - what was this murmuring behind the rocks?"
"Let d be the diagonal of a square with sidelength a. Then, by the words of the great Pythagoras, d*d=2*a*a." A wimpy man was caught in his thoughts. She quickly had tailgated him and posed in front of him, but it looked like he didn't see her at all.
"d must be even - oops, j'adoube! - thus d=2*e and a*a=2*e*e." "Hey! I'm a woman!" "Looks so." He fumbled with a strangle glass gizmo on his nose.
"Thus a is even and a=2*b." "Why are you not even throwing whistles after me?" "You are titillating my thoughts", he grumbled. Manza got angry. "Ha! I'm not sexy enough for you, eh? See! Aren't my breast not like twin deers..." He tried to threw in a confused "But deers have more than two..." when Manza cried "Liar! The greed is already in your eyes!"
She tried to rip his clothes from his body when suddenly a energy net from nowhere fell over her. From a smoke cloud came a man with a giant star-sprinkled hat.
"Please to meet you. Madchick, Magician. Justified Ancient of the one-and-a-half order, with option for first." "You came in the nick of time. Do you know what this harpy wanted from me?"
Manza hissed: "Now I'm helpless and you can at last rape me!" "Sorry, Madam, but my circle prohibits...eh...eh...doing around with women." "Am I surrounded by madmen?" sobbed Manza. "Already in school I learnt that any man wants to rape any woman anytime!" "We have a problem here..." murmured Madchick. "Some con trick...Ah, I've got it! I conjure up a demon, who can then fulfil your wishes, and everybody is satisfied. Abrakadabra Fornicon Beastieboys Snafu!"
A lightning flashed. Manza stammered: "But this is a giant P...P...P... " "Oh my, this look like a real prime exemplar of the species Prickasaurus Rex! Wait until I tell my colleague from the biology dept, he'll make eyes!" "Oh, you are a scientist?" Madchick asked interested. "But you'll immediately see this...Dr. Kaputov, Professor for applied Cabbalistik, Rabulistic and Brainartistic." They wandered along the rocks, discussing freely.
"Ever tried Schmendricks murphygenetic fields?" "Too magic. And have you heard of the Schweinhund rule?" "Too much math. But maybe...one could unify math and magic in a big theory..." "If this is possible, we surely get the No-Bull-Prize for Metaphysics!" "Know what, dear collegue...this could be the beginning of a wonderful friendship!"
Hand in hand, they disappeared into sundown. Behind them, the wind blew away some high squeals.

The End